So Heather and I told Nathan after breakfast that mommy and daddy needed t talk to him. Not sure what a 3yo thinks when you say that to him. I know what I thought in high school, I knew that the DTR (define the relationship) conversation was coming. So here’s what we said,
Nathan, remember how we have been praying for baby Benjamin who has been in the hospital? Nathan says yes! Baby Benjamin was in the hospital because the doctors needed to make sure he was all better before they would let him go home and be with his family. Nathan says, but we prayed and God healed him and now he’s home with his family. That’s right Nathan, he is at home with his family. Nathan, Dr. Crump (mommy’s doctor) has told mommy that she needs to go into the hospital because mammy is sick and she needs to stay there until she is better. Nathan, you going for a sleep-over mommy? Mommy, Yes I’m going for many sleep-overs and you and daddy are going to be sleeping here at the house.
At this point Nathan is trying to put the pieces together and I’m trying to let him process as best he can as a 3yo.
So Nathan, we need to pray for mommy just like we prayed for baby Benjamin when he was in the hospital. We need to pray for the doctors and nurses that will be caring for mommy and that God would heal mommy’s body and she will be able to come home soon. Nathan starting to cry, but I don’t want mommy to leave. Me, Nathan-mommy needs to get better and the best place for her to get better is the hospital. I then suggest that all three of us pray for mommy and that we even place our hands on mommy as we pray. Nathan throws himself on the floor crying, but I don’t want to pray. I then suggest that he listen as we pray for mommy. I prayed for Heather and Nathan moved around on the floor but listened quietly. Afterwards, he was all ready to go on to the next thing.
Now I’m no child psychologist and I’m sure that Nathan is going to be processing things each day and each day will bring its own unique challenges. Here’s what I have observed since our conversation. Nathan will be all excited about doing something and then minutes or even seconds later he will change his mind and not want to do that. This is now new behaviour for him. I’m not sure if the two are related or if it’s just Nathan being 3yo. All I know is that before our conversation he didn’t have this behaviour and now he does. Nathan is a determined 3yo who can stand his ground but when he makes a decision he normally does not change his mind. Now on certain things, not everything, he does.
Nathan’s new behaviour reminds me of driving down the road and watching a squirrel start to cross in front of me. Has this ever happened to you? I honestly have no idea where they are going and if they are going to go half way, the whole way, turn around, go back, freeze, run at the car,etc.. It literally causes me to become anxious and my heart to start racing as I’m approaching the squirrel the possible end of this squirrel’s life.
So when Nathan starts to change his mind and I feel the tension and anxiety rising up within me I’m reminded of this:
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. – Philippians 4:6